I am fierce and absolute. Those who threaten my Father's word will be crushed. I am a good and loyal son. I do things because they are right and because I have to.
A Thousand Years: Write about a time your character was separated from someone they loved by something that couldn’t be helped.
WARNING: FEELS AND DADDY ISSUES AHEAD!
Michael never understood why God left. Hell, he hadn’t even realized for the first few moments after the fact. It was like one second He was there, and the next, He wasn’t. One second, his Father was telling him what to do and how to act, and the next second, there was nothing but emptiness, silence, despair, and utter chaotic confusion. Hell in Heaven.
Michael hadn’t understood, and at first, it had been easy to convince himself that his Father had just stepped out for a few minutes. You know, He’d be back before midnight; He just needed some fresh air, right?
After a long time, Michael was forced to face the fact that his Father was gone. He had to accept that his Father had left him, and they would be separated forever. He gave up hope of ever seeing his Dad again, and it had hurt like hell. It had left him rotting in despair, and his attitude, disposition, and mental state had suffered because of it.
Michael remembered one time thinking that maybe that was how Lucifer had felt being separated like that - feeling as though he wasn’t good enough, feeling unloved, feeling unwanted - all of it for no good reason, too…and after trying so hard….
It was the first time Michael had really reevaluated things.
Words I Never Said: Write seven things you’ve never said, but have always wanted to.
You don’t have to forgive me.
I don’t forgive myself.
I hate myself.
Father, I doubt.
Chasing Pavements: Write about a time your character had to choose between two very important things. Asker gets to specify these things.
If there was anything that stood out in Michael’s memory from his past life, it would be in the beginning, when he had to choose between loyalty to the Father and love of his younger brother, Lucifer.
That had, without question, been the hardest thing Michael had ever experienced in his long life, second only to Lucifer asking him to step away from the Apocalypse, to step off of the chess board their Father had put them on.
Both times, he had chosen their Father…
Both times, he had regretted his decision…
Michael loved Lucifer, just as much as he loved the Father. They had grown up together. Michael had raised Lucifer, taken care of him in ways most people couldn’t understand. He had taught Lucifer everything he, himself, had known, and he had protected Lucifer to the best of his abilities. He had tried to be the perfect son, the perfect older brother, and the perfect soldier…and balancing those things was a practice the eldest Archangel still had not managed to master.
Of course, Lucifer had always been very independent, and the younger Archangel had grown and developed in ways Michael had not foreseen. Lucifer taught and protected himself; he had thoughts and opinions all his own, and inevitably, the two Archangels grew apart.
To Lucifer, Michael became a tyrant, a control freak, a pompous asshole looking to one-up everyone else in the Father’s eyes.
To Michael, Lucifer became an arrogant, spoiled brat who refused to listen and follow rules that were plainly set out before them.
All Michael had ever wanted to do was to share a heart and mind with his younger brother, whom he had been commanded to love, teach, and protect…whom he did love and adore, even when they weren’t getting along.
Michael had thought that maybe when Lucifer was older and done with his training, they could have been one and the same. They could have shared power and rank, worked together to create a world full of the Father’s wonders and desires. He wanted them to share mutual love and respect.
So he tried to force Lucifer to understand, to have faith, to believe in the same things, to do the same things. He tried to force Lucifer to blindly follow the rules because he had never needed explanations, and since he had not needed them, he did not think anyone else should. He believed they were supposed to do only what the Father asked - no questions, no doubts.
He had never doubted; why should anyone else?
When it became apparent that these dreams of Michael’s would not work out, the Archangel had grown bitter and angry. He had learned to resent Lucifer through love of him. It had hurt, and it had ripped them both apart. They both felt betrayed by each other, in different ways.
And then it was only made even worse by the appearance of the Humans…by their Father commanding them all to bow down to this new, strange, uncivilized species.
Michael had thought it odd, but he was not one to speak out against the Father. He bowed down, did as he was asked, and he had expected Lucifer to do the same…
But the younger Archangel had different plans.
And it all went downhill from there.
They fought - endlessly - over what was right and wrong, who was correct, who was better, who was more loved, and it had accomplished nothing but disaster and tragedy.
It came down to a choice.
Michael remembered Lucifer’s exact words: "Stand with me, Brother."
He remembered his own response: "Lucifer, I can’t."
And from then on, nothing would ever be the same.
He had chosen - of his own horrible free will - to tell the Father of Lucifer’s plans, to tattle tale on his little brother, even though he knew the kind of consequences Lucifer’s treason would have.
At the time, it felt like the right thing to do. He thought he was being the good son, the good brother, the good soldier, but he had been wrong, and he had never stopped regretting it…even when he had chosen later on to kill Lucifer, like the Father wanted.
He was just a desperate man, trying desperately to do the right thing…and he would always hate himself for it. His self-hatred equaled his regret, equaled his love and sense of duty, and he was doomed to live conflicted in this way for all of eternity.
How are you going to ma --EOW?! REOW?! MOW, MOW!
I’m not an infant…
*glares* ………..None of us are perfect….
*makes a face, uncomfortable*
Shut up. I’m trying to do the right things.
*glares* You’re dumb.
What kind of statement is that? If you are trying to make me feel bad about myself, you are wasting your time. *grits teeth*
Why what? I have already answered this question…
Why have I not kissed anyone? There has been no need, no one to kiss, and law has not permitted.
Why would I not participate in sexual intercourse with a stranger? Because that would be wrong and unlawful.